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The world is a battlefield. Fight, but without exception, choose kindness


What women want - October 2015

30 Sep 2015

Waking from my dreams, a smile still lingers, the warmth of touch still tingles, and the happiness still cocoons me, strengthens me and prepares me for the onslaught of the reality of my days.

I look forward to my nights as welcome relief, I fully open my mind, heart and soul to that place between awake and asleep, that place where you allow yourself to see what your heart longs for. That place where you remember your dreams. That place where you wish you could live, where you can see how it all could be. I can see how beautiful things could be, can’t you?

There are many people who discourage this type of dreaming, this visualisation of what could be. I think they fear you are only hurting yourself by imagining that which you don’t have. That you should let go of these things, and be more “realistic”. More accepting of your reality.

I think they fear you are at risk of hoping for something that may never happen, for surely, to them, if it was going to happen it would have.

Sometimes I understand their protective encouragement to let go of my dreams. I face each day so hopeful, so positive, as though my dreams have sprinkled a little bit of courage to keep believing that wonderful things are about to happen.

It’s sometimes like waiting for a knock on the door, and expecting there to be a huge bunch of flowers delivered. For no reason. When there’s not even someone in your life who would do that.

So I get why sometimes people encourage you (well, me anyway!) to live “within your reality”. I guess they just really believe the chances of those flowers coming are very unlikely, and they worry that unless something incredible does happen one day, that you’ll eventually run out of hope and crumble.

I’m talking figuratively about the flowers of course. But you get my point. It’s not that I’m not happy with my reality, far, far from it.

I love my home, and my son is a constant source of amazement, pride, joy and giggles. He’s fantastic company, and nurturing his growth and development is my greatest dream come true.

And here’s my point. I have raised my son as a single mum for 12 years. I dreamt of raising a beautiful boy and, against the odds (single mum since he was six-weeks-old isn’t exactly living the dream to many people), that’s exactly what I’ve done. And it’s wonderful.

My reality today is wonderful, my business is doing well (OK, I’m living on a very tight budget and we haven’t had a holiday in years, but it’s growing!). I’m happy. It’s just that I’m not happy to the point that I don’t still wish for more.

I believe I deserve more and my son deserves more. I believe we all deserve to have a level of happiness that we dream of, that we are prepared to work towards, that we would fight for and that we would protect. A level of happiness we would write books about.

I dream of my happiness elevating. For the picture, I imagine for myself to be coloured in with glorious colours. I dream of how it feels to be in the arms of my soulmate, to feel the protection of their love, to look forward into a future that is complete.

It’s not that I’m not happy with what I have, far from it. It’s just that I can also see what I still want. And I’m not afraid to dream of it, to ask the universe to help me bring my dreams into my reality. To recognise the things I believe with all my heart are missing, despite my gratitude and happiness with my current reality.

And my dreams, in turn, help me to stay strong, to believe that it will come. My dreams keep me open to hope and possibility. They keep me thinking that maybe, just maybe the flowers will turn up today. I don’t feel disappointed when they don’t, I just think “maybe tomorrow”.

It costs us nothing to dream, and everything not to. Don’t be afraid of your dreams, no matter how far they may feel from your reality right now. For we have to dream, before our dreams can come true.

With love
Abby xx

Don’t forget you can reach me at (JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address). Please join me on Facebook and Instagram
@abbyjanecrawford, I love sharing stories and journeys with you.

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