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What Women Want - With Abby Crawford Image

What Women Want - With Abby Crawford

Do not fear how love can hurt you
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What women want -  February 2015

05 Feb 2015

It feels calmer, doesn’t it? So many people I’ve spoken to feel the same – it’s different, more peaceful. More reassured. More likely to happen … don’t you think? It just feels different.

I mean, sure, there are still some people who have their list of “resolutions”, their “action plan”, their “new year, new me” schemes … But I think that there is a much bigger sense of knowing. Knowing that things will fall into place, that what is meant to be will, this year, finally be.

When I reflect on the decade gone by, I realise that it has been a tumultuous time, certainly there’s been some incredible highs and some spectacular lows, unexpected turns and totally random twists to the careful plans I’ve set out each new year. I wouldn’t change it (well, ok some of it I would – Stoli in the Bolli is only cute on Ab Fab and those heels that nearly broke my ankle weren’t worth it in the end!), it was a path that brought me to where I am today and it is a path that highlighted to me our own vulnerability to the bigger forces at play – a lesson in how little control we really have over the big things in life, despite our best planning and vision of how we’d like it to be.

I also have realised something, something I think is fairly significant. You see, as a single working mother I am no different to a successful career woman, or to a wife in a mansion with four kids, or to any woman really – we are all time poor.

Our days are busy, consumed with what needs to be done, fulfilling the demands of our businesses, partners, children … And I recall reading many self-help articles and books, how to have it all, how to be you, how to be free – and certainly what seemed to come out if it was the power of “learning to say no”.

Say no to invitations you don’t have time for, say no to working back at the office to get a project done, say no to helping out a friend when it doesn’t suit. And slowly, I think we all started to believe that this empowerment of saying “no” would grant us more freedom, more space, more chance to be the masters of our own destiny …. Did it work?

Well, I don’t think so. So this year, I’m going to do things a little differently – this year, I’m going to start to say “yes”. Yes, I’d love to meet you for dinner. Yes, of course your kid can have a sleepover. Yes, I do want to work back to make sure that project is kick-arse. Yes, I want to have fun and be part of it all!

I’m going to say yes to the things I want to do and just make them all fit in…. I’m going to say yes, even to some things I don’t think I want to do, just to see where it might lead … And I’m going to say yes to pushing myself, just to see what I can achieve ….

What a woman wants is the world to know that when she says no, she means no … but what a girl can’t forget is that life is the biggest adventure of all time, and it’s quite exciting to jump in there and find out what it’s all about.

Say yes to something that challenges you. Say yes to learning something new. Say yes to helping a friend even if you’re time poor – imagine what we could all achieve if we did put more of ourselves into our own lives, and into those around us, imagine what a wonderful world it could be.

So say yes to letting 2015 guide you to achieve your dreams, to rediscover love, to embrace passion, to find peace.

Say yes to opening your heart to the call of the universe, and letting your instincts guide you. Make participation your resolution and communication your key.

I look forward to sharing our journey.

Abby x

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