Winter is for comfort, right?

Comforting food (high calories), comforting drinks (alcoholic – to keep you warm), comforting blankets, comforting fires, comforting marshmallows … the energy of winter is slow and warm and, well … comforting.

It’s a reprieve from the summer months of heat and activity. Winter is the break we need to rest, relax (put on weight) and re-generate. It’s calmer energy, often less frantic with social engagements, often a time of reflection … and sometimes of feeling a little glum. It’s like all the hectic activities are over and you’re sitting there waiting for this glorious time of relaxing to kick but instead your mind floods with things you “should’ve done.”

Well, I’m here to make you feel better about it. Because I’ve been thinking about it a lot. You see, all through the summer and even the autumn months I’ve been flat out doing things. Whether it be out and about with business events, working like crazy towards business goals, kids’ sport every weekend, early starts every day to get in early exercise … I’ve been looking forward to the “comfort” and break of winter, a chance to relax, a chance to stop such a hectic schedule for a while, a chance to sleep in, to restore. So, why does it feel less like a rest, and more stressful than we imagined?

It’s all about energy and how we process it. You see, having finally arrived in my time of “restful comfort” being winter, I’m now actually dealing with all the stress that I was under in the crazy warmer months, all the activity and fast pace priorities that left me with no time to “process” let alone get a good night’s sleep. You think that you’ve dealt with them and moved on because they’re not part of today’s picture, but what you find is that all things you need to process start to emerge and run through your mind the moment your body is restful and in a comfortable place … like winter.

It’s emotional energy, and just like your muscles have memory for exercise and gym workouts, your inner self, or gut instinct or whatever you may like to call it, remembers all the things that you haven’t dealt with and brings them back up for you to face when you finally pause long enough to see it. This is nothing to be concerned by at all, but what does need to happen is you need to face them – the concerns, or stress or worry, the anger or frustration that you have pushed aside is best dealt with so that you can actually get to a place of restoration.

This happened to me recently, when a simple text message from someone long ago (well, summer, but you know…) popped through as I was sitting by the fire enjoying a slow whiskey. I felt all agitated, angry and a million responses ran through my mind … but mostly I was confused as I truly thought I didn’t care about this person, and was long past the anger. In fact, I simply hadn’t dealt with it.

So, if like me, you’re finding when you pause that it’s a little more restless than you would like, then I suggest you look at the energy that is still stored inside your being. Settle and look inside yourself and see what is there – for me, I was able to say to myself “it’s ok you felt angry, it’s ok that you felt upset, it’s ok that you felt sad”. And in acknowledging these emotions and truly seeing the impact, I was able to thank my body for reminding me of these emotions so I could deal with them properly. Energy needs to be moved on, in all things in life. And in recognising these emotions and “hearing” them properly… they actually do go and leave you feeling a lot more, well, comfortable.

So, if you have been struggling to completely relax in your designated downtime, don’t be afraid to let emotions wash over you – it is not weak to “relive” things, but is sometimes required so you can process how you feel, deal with it and let it go. And once you have worked through these things, the relaxation is that much sweeter, the restoration is that much clearer, and you will truly be ready to emerge and conquer so much more.

What a woman wants is to feel strong by not being overcome with negative feelings, but what a woman needs to realise is that the strongest people do have emotions to deal with – it’s just that they have learnt how to move that energy on. I hope that in your time of rest and restoration you can clean out the energy you no longer require – it’s like a reverse spring clean, it’s a winter cleanse of the mind and soul!

I hope you have beautiful peaceful sleeps after a lovely night by the fire. May winter restore us all!

Until next month,

Abby x

PS You can reach me at [email protected] or on social media @abbyjanecrawford