Through my lounge room window, I can see a vivid, scarlet, magnificent hibiscus flower. It is extraordinary.

 

It is extraordinary, as not only is it winter (clearly my hibiscus is perennial), but we have just come through that freezing couple of weeks that swept up the coast bringing snow and the coldest days in literally years.

The flower is extraordinary, as the tree itself has dropped most of its foliage. Gnarly, weathered twigs try to support the snap-frozen remnants of leaves, and yet this magnificent flower is in full bloom.

Its vivid colouring is quite startling against such a grey and barren background and I have been looking at this flower and feeling an overwhelming sense of hope.

If this flower can bloom, and be as beautiful and startling as it is, in the conditions in which it has been living, well, damn it, so can I.

So you’ve probably gathered that the tidal wave of cosmic good fortune and amazingness that I was pretty sure was on its way, hasn’t arrived.

Oh, I’ve still cloaked myself in positivity each morning and embraced whatever “hiccup” the universe has thrown my way, but I have to say it’s getting a little tedious.

Perhaps it’s because each day I’ve been so hopeful that maybe THIS will be the day the magic happens – and then I chastise myself before falling asleep at the end of very long days that I shouldn’t have such high expectations. But what is life, if not to dream, and to long for a little bit of magic?

Don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t dare sit back and just WAIT for something good to come along – I’ve followed all my own platitudes – for example: “When opportunity knocks, open the door”.

I did just that. I had a new enquiry for one of my businesses in an as-yet-unopened market for me, it came after three previous similar enquiries, but this one was a massive event. It was worthwhile.

Right, I thought, that’s the opportunity knocking, let’s open that door.

I spent hours working out how to afford the new stock I’d need in a new city, staff to recruit, storage to consider, travel implications – all the while confirming our quoting and booking with our client. All was locked in, ready for the big launch.

So I thought, well, perhaps my immediate path wasn’t to be united with my soulmate (as was my greatest wish and desire), but to grow my business.

Fabulous – until the client called and cancelled the event. And the universe didn’t even have the courtesy to quickly bring my soulmate across my path as compensation.

Sometimes it just feels that despite doing your best to open promising doors, they are just slamming in your face. I mean you’d be forgiven for sitting down and just giving up hope, wouldn’t you?

But we mustn’t. My resolve is the same – no matter what gets thrown at me, no matter how tough things get, no matter how much hope seems to have forsaken me, I will not be defeated.

We have to believe that good things are coming, we have to know that magic can happen, and we have to believe that we are worthy of love, happiness and success. As a single, working mother, it is not easy to find balance, it is not easy to find support, it is not easy to always face the battles with a smile.

I read a Mexican proverb just yesterday, and it resonated with me “They tried to bury us – they did not know we were seeds ….”

What a woman wants is for her greatest desires to come to fruition, but what a woman needs to believe is that sometimes dreams lie dormant for a reason, waiting for the perfect time to bloom into a spectacular and breathtaking reality. Be patient my darlings, and believe that you will bloom when the time is right.

Until next month,
Abby x

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