The Silly Season

By Abby Crawford 

It’s so hard to keep motivated towards the end of the year.

Even as I am writing this I know how ridiculous it sounds to be saying something like “the end of the year” when in fact it is just the beginning of November. But Melbourne Cup has always launched the start of the “Silly Season” for so many of us and while it used to delight in a flurry of social engagements and champagnes juggled between work meetings and an abundance of energy, I have to confess I now spend more time worrying about how to get everything done.

Maybe it’s because of growing “older” – although I recollect some gloriously magnificent friends in years gone by who were “older” and maintained the juggle of Silly Season with ease and delight. Maybe it’s because of being “single” – although many friends assure me that having a partner to assist in running of house, family and social engagements actually isn’t always a help. Maybe it’s because of running a business on your own – although many small businesses manage to create incredible opportunities networking through this very Silly Season and participate with gusto! Maybe it’s because of the demands of “parenting” – yet this time of year is when things relax for our young ones, whether they are focusing on their role in the Christmas pageant (my favourite was circa 2009 when my son was a Mexican with a poncho and sombrero – still not quite sure of the purpose, but it was cute) or simply looking forward to a long summer holiday. Maybe it’s because it’s just really been one massively big, tiring, stressful year and I can’t wait for it to be over.

There’s a lot of talk at the moment about the negative impact of having so many Instagram and social media accounts talking about goal-setting, best lives and seeming to achieve it all. Are we putting too much pressure on ourselves to deliver so much? There are so many accounts also coming up that show the “truth” of two sides of having a very well-curated and -styled “public facing” profile, while behind the scenes is a makeup-less chaotic scenario which more closely resembles reality for a lot of us! But does it mean we shouldn’t strive for the more polished public profile if that’s what we want? And there’s a lot of talk about finding your “genuine” self in among all of the pressures, expectations, and “inspirations” of those around us. But what if you are just genuinely exhausted?

Ahh my friends, life is a massive rollercoaster. There are simply years that can be wonderful and you can be ready to take on the world. You feel unstoppable, as you overcome obstacles in your path with determination and success and the champagne at the end of the year is a moment to pause and celebrate all you have achieved. And there are years in which things can happen that will rock your very soul, that will take you to the depths of despair in loss and grief, and leave you exhausted with barely the energy to hang a Christmas bauble. But here’s the wonderful part – it is a rollercoaster, and the path will go back to dizzying heights again. Just hang on.

So, here’s my angle: it has nothing to do with age, with being single or partnered, with having your own business or working for someone else. It has nothing to do with whether you have kids at home, whether they are starting kinder or VCE. Life will throw stresses and challenges at every turn. Some years you will find joy in balance, and some years you won’t. So, let people polish their public profile and attend every social function if that’s where their roller coaster is taking them. Let them enjoy it, and celebrate it. And if your roller coaster is sitting down the bottom and you’re catching your breath from a freakishly speedy trip down a rattling track, well don’t worry that your hair is everywhere and your makeup long gone – take a breath and know that it will slowly start to make its way back to the top.

Whatever your end of year is looking like, I hope that you do find peace in knowing that you’ve done your best – whether you are just surviving, or high fiving. Whether you are delightfully balancing atop high heels with a champagne in hand, or sitting this one out with a glass of wine in calm reflection. Finding your genuine you is simply about being okay with doing whatever you feel ready for, to allow yourself to be where you are.

Till next month,

Abby.